Rock Center

Did anyone watch the tree lighting at Rockefeller Center last night? Well, if you didn't honey, you didn't miss much to be sure!! I mean the tree is beautiful and all, though how you can go wrong with all those lights I couldn't say. But the performers? My God, was NBC scraping the bottom of the barrel or what?

First of all, it's a CHRISTMAS SHOW, I don't think it would be too much to ask for a carol or two. Nobody wants to hear Christina Aguilera sing a song called "Hurt" in the middle of a festive celebration. Thank you Debbie Downer.

And if you are going to sing a carol, John Legend, please just sing the damn thing like it was supposed to be sung. We don't need the jazzy soul version of Oh Holy Night, we need the version sung by someone with a big enough voice to pull it off and at least pretend they mean it!

Now I love me some Better Midler, but honey, what the hell were you thinking with that hat? It was fine when you had white feathers on you coat collar, but somehow they morphed into a turban the likes of which have never been seen below the Artic Circle, and it was just too much! Also, do not go changing the worlds of non-holiday songs to try and make them sound Christmasy. "From A Distance" was a lovely, inspirational tune TWENTY YEARS AGO WHEN YOU FIRST RELEASED IT, but you need to get some new writers if the best you can do is "from a distance...it looks like Christmas Eve." Give me a break.

Y'all know back in the day, having ol' Hall & Oats as the house band woulda been quite the coup, but last night was not the kinda come back you write home about. Why can't aged rock stars just sit they asses on the couch and collect royalties? Why must they all insist upon relaunching themselves into the realm of popular music sans clue or capability? You should end on a high note, not any note you can still squawk out 25 years later.

As for Talyor Hicks, well, it's unclear what he's been doing with his time and American Idol's money, cause it sure ain't been writing good songs.

I tell ya folks, last night's tree lighting made me once again thankful for DVR. I just fastfowarded right on through the has-beens, the wanna-bes, and the totally inappropriates until I got to the good stuff.

The 2 hour program lasted about 5 and a half minutes.